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Alison Stewart: This is All Of It. I'm Alison Stewart, live from the WNYC Studios in Soho. Thank you for spending part of your day with us. Whether you're listening on the radio, live streaming, or on demand, I'm really grateful you're here. On today's show, Emilio Estevez starred in some of your favorite films from the '80s, but he's also a screenwriter and a director. Next month he's re-releasing his 2010 film, The Way, about a man completing a religious Pilgrimage following his son's death. It stars Martin Sheen, Emilio's father. We'll talk about what it's like to direct your dad and why Estevez says the film about finding your way is even more meaningful now than when it came out 13 years ago.

Full bio's our monthly book series when we have a continuing conversation about a deeply researched biography, to get a full understanding of the subject, and for National Poetry Month, we're going to learn more about the poet, Phillis Wheatley, who was the first African-American, the first enslaved person, and only a third colonial-era woman to publish a book of poetry. Plus musician Peter One released his first album in Côte d'Ivoire in 1985. Next Friday, he'll release his second, and tonight he opens for the Walkman at Webster Hall. He joins us for a live performance in the studio. That is the plan for today. Let's get this started with friends and how to make and keep them.

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In her latest book, Lane Moore writes, no one tells you that the ages of 18 to 22 are pretty much prime friendship real estate. This is the time she argues when it's easiest to find your people, your pals, that group of friends who will be with you for the rest of your life. Her book is called You Will Find Your People: How to Make Meaningful Friendships as an Adult. There are chapters titled figure out what friendships you want, how to Identify and ask for what you need, how to adjust your friendship levels from casual friends to close friends and back again, and staying friends with Exes, an essential guide.

Lane Moore is the author of the book, How to Be Alone: If You Want To, and Even If You Don't, is the creator and host of the Tinder Live comedy show. She has an event tonight at The Strand at 7:00 PM and Tinder Live will host a book release party this Saturday, April 29th at Littlefield in Brooklyn. Lane is in our studios right now. Welcome to the show Lane.

Lane Moore: Thank you so much.

Alison: Listeners, have you made a new friend recently? How did you meet? What did you bond over? Or maybe you've reconnected with a friend from the past, what made you decide to reach out to them? Share your experience with us, finding friendship in adulthood. Give us a call, 212-433-9692, 212-433-WNYC, 212-433-9692, or you can hit us up on social media @AllOfItWNYC. Your last book was about being alone and feeling content with being alone. What made you to decide to write a book about the opposite, about friendship?

Lane: It's really a continuation, I think. My first book, How to Be Alone was all about me being alone for most of my life. Just not having the family that you're supposed to have, not having the friends that you're supposed to have, not having that perfect partner and just bumping up against all those things, and feeling very alone in that because there is this idea that we all get a really great loving, stable family, we all get really wonderful friends, we all get a really incredible partner, nobody struggles with any of this if you do some things wrong with you, and me really just feeling like, oh, actually this is what my experience has been like and I actually really have struggled to connect with people because I didn't have that innate connection as a little kid that I was told everybody else but me got.

Then the more work I did on myself to become so much more comfortable being alone and seeing it as, if I'm all I have, then I really have to shore up my relationship with myself. If I'm going to have to be my own parent and I'm going to have to be my own friend group and all of these things, then I really have to cultivate that relationship.

Then once I did, and you do that work, the first thing that I thought was, oh, now I want better friendships. I feel so much more equipped now that I have more self-esteem, I actually love myself more, I enjoy being with myself, I'm in a much better position to be a better friend and to choose better friends, but how the hell do you do that when you feel like everybody already paired off, everybody already got their friends and now you're the only one who's like, actually I still would really love these friendships that I really wanted as a kid. Where do you even begin? You Will Find Your People really explores that journey and all these feelings that I think so many of us have where even if we thought we had our people we don't now, and so that starting over of, oh, can you even do this after high school or college?

Alison: It's interesting because the book also does have a memoir aspect to it. Why did you feel comfortable writing about this?

Lane: Has anyone said comfortable? It is a little uncomfortable. I say that because it's like I did write it from a place of that uncomfortability. It was really scary and I think that's really what I want to say. It did feel very scary to say, oh, I don't necessarily have my people yet, that didn't feel comfortable to say, it doesn't feel comfortable for us to say. I think that what helped me write about it even though it was wasn't comfortable was that when I wrote How to Be Alone, I was writing about all these things that I had never seen anybody talk about and I was very terrified. I was really worried people were going to be like, why didn't you have all these things that you're supposed to have through no fault of your own? People didn't do that.

I still get hundreds and hundreds of letters saying, I feel this way all the time, I've never heard anyone say that. I was very scared to write about not having your people yet, because so much of the way the world treats you if you don't have that is like, it must be something wrong with you. You must be, maybe no one likes you, or you're doing something wrong. Why are you choosing the wrong friends? You're bad at friendship. I don't think that's compassionate. I don't think that's true. I think it assigns a shame that shouldn't be there. Even writing this book was an act of radical self-love to be able to say, hey, I'm going to write about struggling with this and my struggling with this should not have any shame attached to it. All it takes really is one person to raise their hand and say, I'm really struggling with this, and then other people are like, "Me too."

Alison: I know where we all get our ridiculous notions about what a romance should be, from various sitcoms and certain love songs. Where did you get all the input of what a friendship should be? Maybe also not the most useful input about what friendships should be and should look like.

Lane: Yes. So much of the information that I got on what friendships should look like was in pop culture. It was in TV shows, movies, books. So much of what I saw was these friends who there were five of them and they hung out every single day at the same coffee shop, at the same hot restaurant together. They talked about their day. There for each other in thick and thin. With me, I was like, some of my friends actually moved and they live long distance, and some of my friends I see once every five months and just really comparing myself to all of these things and never really measuring up or I would have a friend and sometimes I would feel like they weren't a very good friend and they were mean, but I would think, don't think that, just keep playing it through.

We don't want to give up on our friendships and we don't see friendship breakups in media. We don't show when a friend is a little bit crappy and makes you feel bad and you have this toxic dynamic. We don't show that because it's not fun to watch and it's not fun to live. If all we see is this really idyllic, we always get along. If we don't, there's only like one episode throughout six seasons where we'll talk about it. Then we're sitting there thinking, why don't I have this? Why doesn't it look right?

Alison: Let's take some calls. Virginia is calling from Manhattan. Virginia, thank you so much for calling All Of It. You're on the air.

Virginia: Hi. Hi. Thanks for having me. Love your show.

Virginia: Thanks.

Alison: I got back together with a friend that I hadn't seen in 17 and a half years and the way I got back together with her was I was decluttering finally, and I found some paintings she had done as a teenager, we had met in high school and I called her up and that was it. I got back and she's like, I'm seeing her as a friend now again.

Alison: That's so lovely. Do you remember, what were the first few things you talked about, Virginia?

Virginia: Oh wow. We're not real youngsters and we were talking about people who died.

[chuckles]

Alison: That's what's going on in your life. You talk about how's meaning your life in the moment. Let's talk to Maureen from Westchester. Hi Maureen. Thanks for calling All Of It.

Maureen: I had a wonderful experience when I finished my BA, I worked in a chain store and I met a really nice guy and I had never had a male friend before. We used to hang out a little bit. I wound up marrying somebody else. He wound up getting a motorcycle and traveling cross country, and I figured that was the end of it. Many, many years later when John Lennon died, I just felt so sad and so bereft that something so horrible could happen and none of my girlfriends could really help me.

My marriage was over and I thought about this guy and I looked him up in the old Yellow Pages and his dad answered the phone and put me in touch with him and we started to play tennis together and we got to be really good friends. After about 15 years of being good friends second time over in our 30s and 40s, we wound up, we got married and we adopted a little girl and we're both 70 now.

Alison: That was such a lovely story. Maureen, thank you for calling in. Lane, do you want to respond or react to either of our calls?

Lane: I love both of those so much because a lot of the time we think we have to put all this effort in making friendships happen on a certain timeline. I love both of these stories because both of those friendships were on their own timeline. You reconnected at the exact moment you were supposed to reconnect, and it would've been such a shame if you'd tried to keep that friendship going in a time where it wasn't right.

I think we talk a lot about romantic relationships like being meant to be, but friendships are just as meant to be. If you were meant to be friends, you're going to end up being friends with each other again, even if it ends in the meantime. I think that's so lovely.

Alison: Let's talk to Sam from Levittown, New York. Hi Sam. Thanks for calling in.

Sam: Hey, thanks for taking my call. I actually also reconnected with a friend. I'm a little bit younger than them. I'm only 25, but I was living in a different part of the state and moved back suddenly. I had no friends down here, so I hit up a couple of old people and immediately became fast friends with one of my old friends. Now I've got my two friends that I've had for 10 years. I'm trying to look for any suggestions for how to make new friends.

Alison: Sam, excellent call. Lane has some answers in her book, You Will Find Your People: How to Make Meaningful Friendships as an Adult. Where are some good places to look for adult friends for people in their 20s and 30s?

Lane: I think that it's not necessarily the location because I don't think the location is necessarily it. If you think about it, I'm guessing that this caller and so many of us, we meet people all the time in various ways. I don't think it's really that because a lot of the advice that people tend to give about friendship is like, "Oh, go to a meetup, go to a bar alone."

If it were that simple, no one would struggle with it. I actually don't think it's the location. I think that so much of it is these little moments of vulnerability, of putting yourself out there of the next time that I know for me, I have lots of little moments where I'm out with my dog and someone's like, "Oh, your dog is so cute. Can I pet your dog?"

We have that brief interaction with each other and you have that moment where you're like, "Oh, this person's cool. Do they think I'm cool? Are we actually connecting?" Nobody wants to be the one to say like, "Would you want to get coffee or something? Maybe go to the dog park next week?" No one wants to be the one to say that. I think as we get older and we're adults, your threshold for like, I don't want to weird them out, and you think that way much more.

I really like to encourage people to take those moments to say, if you have a connection with somebody, if there's somebody you see around a lot or you run into them at the grocery store or a coffee shop or whatever it is, explore the connections that you have and see if there's something deeper there. Just don't be afraid to take those little moments that we have these connections and see if they can be deepened.

Alison: Somebody you see at the gym all the time. Maybe you take the same gym class. Sounds like things that are organic in your life anyway. We do have those people, like when you walk your dog, you pass the same person. You stop and you talk. You're saying maybe just take it that one step further. Maybe ask them one more question. Maybe suggest taking it outside of that little universe where you know the person.

Lane: Exactly because I think we put so much pressure. I know for me, I don't want to go to some event with this pressure on myself that I have to go and make friends. I have to go to this mixer or something.

I don't want to put that pressure on myself. I think it's nicer to just have a little bit more openness about you and a little bit more vulnerability in your life to be able to have somebody come past your life and say, "Oh, maybe this is a new friend. Maybe this could be it. As opposed to making it this hard assignment." You have to do

Alison: How do you feel about internet friends, social media friends, people like you? Maybe you're liking each other's posts a lot. Maybe you find you might realize you live in the same neighborhood or you went to the same concert.

Lane: I absolutely wanted to talk about internet friends and things like that in this book because there is such a really needless stigma around people who are long-distance or internet friends, but you meet people how you meet people. If there is somebody who always comments something really nice on your post or you always really like their posts, there's absolutely nothing wrong with saying there's so many friendships.

Honestly, a lot of my friendships have began that exact way where I just was like, "I really like the stuff you post." They were like, "I love the stuff you post." Again, those moments of vulnerability because that's really what it takes. It's not that we're not seeing our people out there in the world, but it takes that little moment of sliding into someone's DM and saying like, "I think you're great. I would like to be your friend, or would you want to maybe talk on the phone or I'm going to this thing next weekend." Something that's lower stakes, I guess than a phone call. Just something that opens a door and then they can walk through it or not.

Alison: My guest is Lane Moore. The name of the book is You Will Find Your People: How to Make Meaningful Friendships as an Adult. Listeners, we want to get you in on this conversation. Have you made a new friend recently?

How did you meet? What did you bond over, or maybe you've reconnected with someone from your past, what made you decide to reach out? Share your experiences with us. Give us a call. 212-433-9692 212-433-WNYC or hit us up on social media @AllOfItWNYC. We'll have more with Lane. We'll discuss friendship breakups as well after the break.

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You're listening to All Of It. My guest this hour is Lane Moore. Her new book is called, You Will Find Your People: How to Make Meaningful Friendships as an Adult. It is out today. Listeners, if you've made a meaningful friendship as an adult, we want to hear how you did it. 212-433-WNYC, 212-433-9692, or if you want to hit us up on social media @AllOfitWNYC.

If you'd like to remain anonymous, you can always send us a DM on Instagram. We have a question about something that you addressed in your book Lane. Let's talk to Holly, who is calling in from Manhattan. Hi Holly.

Holly: Hello. Thank you for my call. The one thing I think nobody prepared me for and the media doesn't help at all, I broke up with probably one of my closest friends and it was very, very emotionally devastating. It was a divorce. There was really no other way to describe the pain and the sense of grief that I had.

Interestingly, years later, I actually didn't reach out to her directly. I reached out to a mutual friend just to see how she was doing. I think we've just changed. That experience, I have to tell you, it was really one of the hardest things I had ever gone through and it was very confusing.

I don't think we talk enough about it. I don't know that we equip ourselves to learn how to deal with the breakup of friendships because they're so near and dear to us. They really have such a source of great joy and love to our lives, and so many people have them. I just wanted to put that out there. Thank you.

Alison: Thank you so much for calling Holly. You do address this in your book Lane when there is a friendship which you realize can't be repaired, something has gone wrong. What is the time to know that it might be time to move on from a friendship?

Lane: When you constantly find yourself questioning it. One of the things I like to remind myself and others in this book, and I have to remind myself often is your friendships are meant to be enjoyed. They're not meant to be endured. Many of us, myself included, are often in a long friendship and we're like, "This is really painful a lot of the time, but we're friends and I'm just going to suck it up."

No, no, no. That's not it. When you find yourself questioning it a lot, when you find that it's painful a lot it's really time to reassess. That's not how friendships are supposed to feel.

Friends are supposed to be-- They might take work, they might not always be perfect, that's fine. When you're facing that uphill battle and you're like, "Oh, this is rough. This isn't good anymore. Maybe it was never good." I think that we know it's just we want to avoid that friendship breakup because it's so horrible.

We don't want to do it. We want to just somehow push through it and get to a better place. I think we have to be honest with ourselves when that's happening.

Alison: What's the best way to communicate this? What are some ways that you've found in your writing and your research to communicate this friendship is no longer either valuable or very valuable? Maybe isn't useful to both of us. Maybe that's one way to say it.

Lane: Absolutely. In the book, I talk about two different scenarios that I would advise, and I like to say that because I don't think there's one size fits all. I think there's two types of friends who are at this crossroads. There are friends who have never talked to their friend about what's going wrong in the friendship. With those friends, please talk to them about it. I have and I know so many people have been on the receiving end of somebody who ended a friendship without ever telling me what I did wrong, without ever giving me an opportunity to say my side of it, to say I didn't know you needed that. I would love to give you that. Please, please give that person an opportunity to show up for you. They might not and then you can walk away, that's okay.

I know there are so many people who will leave a friendship, where they have never communicated what they need, they have never communicated any of these things and the friendship really could have been saved. I know on the receiving end, it's so painful when somebody leaves you without even a chance to make it right. On the other side of that, which is what I have often found myself in in friendship breakups is when you have tried so many times to tell this person, this is what I need. This is hurtful to me. I'm not getting what I need.

With those people, you don't have to have an exit interview. You don't have to say I'm leaving now. With those people, I would absolutely encourage you to just walk away because I know for me, it's so easy to say, I'm going to sit them down one final time and say I don't want to do this, but I'm not getting what I need and blah, blah, blah. Then I had to realize for myself, no, because what is that really? That's not communication anymore? That's continuing to ask them to change. They're not going to change. You can't keep begging for somebody to treat you well.

To those people, I would really advise you just leave.

Alison: Kilby has a question. Kilby is calling in from Queens. Hi, Kilby. Thanks for calling in.

Kilby: Hi, there. You've answered some of what I'm going to ask in your previous response. I moved away to California for 10 years in my 20s and I had a friend who really took me in and introduced me to a great friend group and was a big part of my life. We grew to be codependent and stopped being able to communicate our frustrations about that codependency. Rather than talking about it, I've moved away and we were in different time zones, and that friendship faded, but it's somebody who remains important to me. We're about to see each other for the first time in a few years at a friend's wedding.

I want to bring it up, I'm not sure if it's the right setting, but largely just want to talk about codependency and friendships.

Alison: Also, so you're going to see this person again. When you're in that situation that maybe you have exited from a friendship, but you know you'll end up in the same space again what do you think, Lane? Is that something you want to address head-on or is it just time to put on your polite voice?

Lane: For what it's worth to this caller, I have struggled so much with people pleasing and codependency. That is absolutely so much of this book is coming from that perspective of wanting to do things right and then finding yourself a bit more enmeshed than you want. I fully, fully relate to that so much. What I would say is because I know you're probably stressing about it, don't stress about it too much before the wedding. If you can. I know you're going to. I know you will. See how you feel that day because I know so often I want to formulate the right response. Who knows, you might get there and the vibe might be very strange and you're like, oh, this isn't the time.

Now I've spent all this time worrying. This actually isn't the right thing. What I will say is, if you do want to talk about it, again leading with that vulnerability, I've had to have those kinds of conversations where sometimes it's as simple as saying, if you feel like they're open to it, and you're not making it awkward for both of you or something if they seem open to you and you're already talking just to say, "Hey, I just want to put this out there, no pressure, I know we're at a wedding. I'm not trying to dredge all this up in any way but I really miss you. I'm really sad that that happened to us. Maybe that was as far as our friendship will go and maybe you're totally fine but I just want you to know that I miss you and you're really important to me."

Just having that moment again, leaving that door open and maybe they'll meet you there emotionally and maybe they'll say I miss it too. Then you can repair it. Maybe there'll be a little more standoffish and you won't get what you need but I don't think we lose anything by being really honest and vulnerable with people and taking that chance.

Alison: Let's talk to Julie from Chelsea. Hi, Julie. Thanks for calling All Of It.

Julie: Hi, thanks for taking my call. This is such an important subject. Good to talk to you. I was just going to say that one of the ways I made friends when I moved from New York to San Francisco, probably 20 years ago, I had a falling out or distancing from a couple of good friends there and I was looking this is in the early days of Craigslist, but I was looking for an amour for my apartment. Everything's on the same page and I came across an ad that said, looking for people who want to meet up for happy hour who have lived abroad. That was the tying interest.

I grabbed my friend that studied in France with me, and we went to this happy hour and we ended up making a group of friends that we're still with for 20 years since because of that posting. It's hard to do but I also wanted to emphasize that even in college, we try to emphasize with our kids. My daughter is in college, that, oh, you're going to make the best friends of your life there. Which doesn't always happen. I think we have to be careful about that too if everyone thinks they have their group of friends and you don't. How do you feel? There's two parts of that story.

Alison: Julie, thank you for weighing in. Let's talk to Louisa from Manhattan. Hi, Louisa. Thanks for holding. You're on the air.

Louisa: Hi, thank you for having me. I have been living in New York for four years. I had like a very solid counterculture skater culture that I was a part of and I found that was the cornerstone of my friend group but recently, I fell out of that and still skating. One thing that really, really helped me find, retap into my friend group was literally finding myself going on, I call these self dates and spending time with myself and analyzing even nervous behavior, the way I'm standing, and the way I'm fiddling and just being really comfortable.

That led to me finding people that had similar interests as me and even if it's just very broad interests for DJing to go into art shows to this, that, and science, it was just like, wow, once I'm comfortable with myself, I was able to find people who helped feed my soul and find that it was multifaceted. It wasn't just this one cornerstone of my friendship. I'm not 30 yet, but living in a big city, it can be very isolating. You can feel alone, but then it's just like, be alone then. Sometimes it's just do it and be alone.

Alison: Louisa I'm going to dive in because it sounds like Lane that she is going through what you went through.

Lane: Yes. That was entirely my first book called How to Be Alone. That really was it. I absolutely agree. So much of that first book was me really bolstering my relationship with myself figuring out what I wanted to do when I was alone, going on dates with myself, going to dinner alone, all these things and really figuring out who I was. Figuring out what childhood patterns I had that weren't serving me, figuring out the types of people that I was attracting. Why was I attracting them? Why was I tolerating these behaviors? In the second book, I talk about that because once you come out of that, oh, I've spent all this time alone.

Then sometimes what happens is, you realize, oh, no, I'm still choosing the wrong people. There's still some things that need adjustment. I still need to bolster this. What's great about when you have that relationship with yourself and you have more of that self-love, is you're able to remind yourself that the information about your worthiness has been updated. You're able to sit there and make different choices and say, oh, actually, we don't have to tolerate this anymore. I may have done that five years ago but now I remember that I have value.

The great thing is, the more people that you meet, I'm sure you've experienced this, the more people you meet who accept you for all of your weirdness and all the things about you that are maybe different, the easier it becomes to let the people go who don't?

Alison: Let's talk to Rachel calling in from Westwood New Jersey. Hi, Rachel.

Rachel: Hi, how are you?

Alison: Doing great. How are you today?

Rachel: Good. I just wanted to say that this is a wonderful topic. It should be something that we speak about more. Coming from someone who's lived the good, bad, and the ugly when it comes to friendships. I think that we should just be exploring the lengths, the breadth, the depth of friendship, a lot more than we do. I did want to say and I called in because the author was saying that it's quite unusual to meet someone through your dogs and that people are often trepidatious about asking someone for coffee or whatnot. Actually, that happened to me recently, over the dogs. I'm usually the pursuer, and in this case, it was the pursuee who asked me for coffee after our dogs met. That was a unique experience for me coming from someone who's usually doing the pursuing.

Alison: Rachel, she actually said it's a good place to do it, but don't be afraid to do it. I think you guys are, you and Lane are actually on the same page. I did want to follow up with some concrete steps that we can take Lane, because I have found that people who I have made adult friendships with are people who make plans, date in time, and then show up.

Lane Moore: Then show up.

Alison: There's something about our culture, and I know it's-- We'll plan that, we'll get together, I'll text you about that, I'll DM you about that, and then everybody has good intentions, but then it doesn't happen. I found the people that I've made friendships with that they say it, and, "How about Tuesday at 5:00 at [unintelligible 00:30:31]" or whoever? There's definitely concrete. You have to actually do it.

Lane: You have to actually do it. I talk about that in the book where there are some times where I make a plan with a new friend and I'm tired that night or whatever, but I keep the plan. I keep it. Sometimes we're not even tired or we're nervous, and we don't want to be hurt again, and maybe it's not worth it, and we don't feel like it. We make all of these excuses, but I think that we have to follow through. Again, it's this vulnerability, and it's making it a priority because it'd be great if it could just happen naturally. I think that's what a lot of us want. We want friends who are delivered to our house like UPS packages and we don't have to look for them, we don't have to put any work in, we don't have to sort through them, but what really is like dating in that way. We have to give people a chance, we have to show up to that friend date, we have to give them a shot.

Alison: Let's talk to Marie from Brooklyn. Hey, Marie, thanks for calling All Of It.

Marie: Hi. Thanks, Alison. I graduated from college 40 years ago, and I'm a lesbian, I was a very early bloomer. I had great friends in college, but a lot of the other folks who weren't my friends, I just didn't know who I could really trust in terms of safety and all kinds of things. Anyways, fast forward, and at the very beginning of the lockdown here in Brooklyn, it was a devastating time, this friend reached out to me, who I did keep in touch with, and she had a whole group of friends, all these straight women who I didn't really know, and we started these monthly Zoom meetings because we just wanted to check in with each other. We just, "How are you holding up? How are you doing?"

That was three years ago and now we end up meeting every month. These people who I prejudged in college just grew up to be these amazing women, and I'm so glad that I got the opportunity to reconnect with them. Two of them in this group have passed away in the last three years and we've been comforting each other. One of them in particular I was good friends with, and I am so grateful that I got a chance to reconnect with her through these calls before she died. It's really taught me a lot about from the early '80s to now, how people have grown, and the people they've become, and it's just been a wonderful reconnection.

Alison: Marie, thank you so much for sharing your story. I'm glad you were able to make that connection. Lane, before we go, you want to drop any last piece of wisdom?

Lane: Yes. I will say, to that point, the caller with the dog. I actually dedicated, You Will Find Your People to my dog, my dog is in my author photo. There is a whole chapter actually about how your pets can be this really wonderful bridge. My dog is a very sweet 8-pound rescue chihuahua, and when I got her it was my first experience with having someone in my life who was consistent, and loving, and showed up for me every single time, and even when I did something wrong, still loved me. I think that is such a powerful thing for people to experience, and I think that counts as a friendship.

I really want us to talk about that more because I think so many of the calls really all had their own versions of friendship, and I think that that's really what I want this book to do, is to have people realize that you can meet your people anywhere and whatever friendship looks like for you that feels great, that counts, that's enough.

Alison: The name of the book is You Will Find Your People: How to Make Meaningful Relationships as an Adult. It's by Lane Moore. Lane will be in conversation with Amber Tamblyn tonight at The Strand at 7:00 PM and we'll host a book release party this Saturday, April 29th, at Littlefield in Brooklyn at 7:00 PM. Lane, thanks for coming to the studio and taking listeners' calls. I hope we helped some people today.

Lane: Absolutely. Thank you.

 

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